Waffling in THREE dimensions.

Saturday, September 29, 2007


I couldn't stop thinking about this episode of CSI about infantilism after linking to that article. It was totally weird. Not as weird as the furry episode or the one where the cheerleaders ate that chick...

King Baby - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

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Very Tasteful

Story: I was killing time before SNL started tonight and I cruise by Facebook and notice that a high school cohort had just ended a relationship. I had never met this other person and was frankly, baffled that such a situation had arisen to a point that required anything less than a premature truncation. I had to check out this person's profile. I must admit, I was impressed by the caliber of girl, although not by the "In a Relationship" tag in her profile (it appeared she jumped ship on that high school chum). She was one of them. Unfortunately, this meant that I had to listen to that song. Damn, it's catchy, if short. I start to wonder what more I could find out about the artist creating such hits as "Forest Ninja (I love the Sasquatch)" and "Wiki-Man" so I typed his moniker into my Wikipedia search bar. VeryTasteful as one word gets 1 hit, so I tried it with the space. Whoa, what's that 5th link? That's right:

Erotic lactation - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

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Thursday, September 20, 2007

Center Number

In case I've made a huge mistake.


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I just saw an advert on the telly for a clinical research trial involving children with ADHD. Usually I find such ads disgusting, as most reminders tend to, but this one made me laugh. It had listed one of the possible symptoms as "excessive talking," something I discovered in myself, to my horror, at around age 10 chatting my father up on a father-son excursion. Poor guy. Perhaps the joke would be better if you knew my brother, who professes that he was "born to talk," and earned the nickname just yesterday "Chatty Catty". Yes, I know it was a doll named Cathy, or Kathy, whatever, but Cathy does not go MEOW when he won't stop talking, a cat will.

I've also noticed recently how impulsive I am. Perhaps it has always been a latent quality, or one renewed by this venture, but I never observed it until recently when I was fervently typing text messages into my phone that it took a great deal of effort to not send to no one in particular who would enjoy them. They existed because I felt they should, not that they revealed some great desire, just some little desire. I don't know what I'm saying. And my computer is lagging on the type display so I suppose I should stop. I should stop Torrenting too, but its rather addictive as well.

*Something philosophical about the natures of dreams*

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Tuesday, September 11, 2007


Why did I look? It is so insidiously awesome. I couldn't possibly blow more than one paycheck on it, right? I've made a huge mistake..

Halo 3 - Halopedia - a Wikia wiki

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Saturday, September 08, 2007


"Did Derek leave?" I silently closed the door.

"Why did you leave?"

"You didn't say good bye."

"... But why didn't you tell me you were leaving.. I would have walked you out.."

"I know you don't like Katie, but I thought you were better than that. Maybe I'll see you at Christmas."
"I hope so," I softly replied.
I watched her drive off, not bothering to wipe off the tears that trickled down my face, wishing.

Friday, September 07, 2007


"What are you going to college for, Derek? I was thinking about it the other day and couldn't figure it out," Drew asked as he slammed down another brick. Goddamn, I'm tired of bricks.
I stammered. What answer could I give? Did I want to confess the deep inadequacy I feel weekly in a suffocating religion that makes me questions the validity of my very existence? Tell them that I could no longer bear the pressure and fled to enroll in a community college rather than suffer it any longer though I fear it shall not offer the great respite I crave? These were men I would tolerate for only a week longer, with varying degrees of tolerance. Occasionally the discussions ventured away from the usual homosexual accusations and innuendo so far to reach into the realms of theology. I hate those. Curtis's mother is a Jehovah's Witness. He says it's a cult. I don't want to talk about mine. I tell them it only specifies hot drinks; it is old. They are befuddled. I try to let it blow over.
I told them what has become my standard answer: I don't know what I want to do with my life and see no point in spending more money than necessary until such time. They seem satisfied. They don't ask questions about missionary ambitions. I am thankful.
Sometimes I want to go. It would be a great experience. A new language, exotic culture. Stuff like that. But how can I serve a church whose tenets, if followed, would have prevented my existence? It's been wracking my brain for sometime now: how can both freewill and fate coexist? One must take precedence! It just doesn't make sense. I can't figure it out. Either my existence is folly, or fornication was preordained. It's late; I'm not sure what I'm saying. I'm conflicted. I seem to be a complicated individual.
I sent a text to a friend who is going somewhere in life. The text was simple: What do you want to be when you grow up?

The answer was simple: Happy.


This week I've done three things: stack bricks, watch The Office, and avoided cleaning the kitchen. I only have one week left. I'm exhausted. It seems like forever.

There's a man on Ellen, in the next room, talking about ADHD. "This is about you," Amanda tells Ethan. He wants her to change the channel back to OPB. "This is about you; you have ADHD." An amateur's diagnosis. Ethan is confused.
"What's that? Is it a disease? Is it bad? Is it bad?"

"Sometimes it is," my sister replies.

Monday, September 03, 2007

When I Grow Up:

I'd like to be a better driver. A little taller too, maybe..

Sunday, September 02, 2007

Sunday Malaise: Revelations

It seems to happen on a weekly basis. Perhaps in part to the realization that the weekend is concluding and another unfortunate work week is about to begin. Or perhaps to the lurking guilt that doing anything on Sunday seems reluctant to relinquish. My family is watching some bastard American Idol presentation. Abhorrent! Revelation: I used to be funnier. I imagine that extends into these bloggerings. Should I search for a place that might accommodate whale watching planerings. Revelation I used to write a lot better. I'll probably just end up spending the whole day cleaning the kitchen on my day off instead. Abhorrent!

Revelation: Jerky is delicious.Bacon is delicious. Where can I find a combination of the two?