I've got a fever

Sadly, I missed Walken's performance last week on SNL and haven't bothered to check out the highlights. While I've made a habit of watching my favorite shows the day-after, I don't with late night programs. I suppose I've come to the conclusion that there will always be more (and similar) content later to enjoy. I'm actually referring to viral marketing.

I've become a sneezer. Or I fear I have. Maybe I am just sharing things I love with people I love and there's nothing inherently wrong with that, certainly. The product I shared wasn't engineered to be contagious, or rather, it didn't seem overtly so, but I still decided to make a comment on FaceSpace about it. I was infected.

I recall the first time I heard that buzzword, viral. It was in regards to a Pepsi Superbowl ad. It was 2005 and people were figuring out how to use the Internet. I don't think it was intentional, just lucky casting, but Mandy Amano was a hit and everyone praised Pepsi for being awesome and whatever. Then people started trying to do it on purpose instead of letting it happen. Viral isn't just a buzzword, it's a goal.

I feel all jaded, unnecessarily. I'm torn as it if I should even mention the site that has inspired this fulmination or if that would be somehow immoral. Would it be a service to them or an exploitation of myself or both? The line of questioning continues logically until I wonder: just how lame am I being now?

Fortunately, GoogleAds answers my question. While I don't use them on this blag, I'm somewhat tempted to, just to find out what it would direct people to. It also told me where I can find Local Emo Guys & Girls and ringtones(!), although I like the one I have.

I probably wouldn't be so worked up about this whole thing if I hadn't discovered that the Ask a Ninja guys make over $100,000 a month in ad revenue for a format they lifted from the Brothers Chaps. I don't know if I grew tired of the format(I can't remember the last time I watched Strong Bad) or quality became poorer, but I stopped watching after episode 65, which had been preceded by long absences between episodes which waned interest. Its difficult to compromise my love of Very Tasteful and adoration of Crista Flanagan with usual disdain for vloggers and my reluctance to recommend but I'll console myself with the thought that no one actually reads this and even less follow the links.

And, of course, by writing this at all, I've only stoked the fire.

Proper Dental Hygiene

I guess it does kind of vibrate..

I briefly mentioned yesterday the importance of proper dental hygiene. Like less than a sentence. I'm really making a stretch to backlink here. In that same pitiful sentence I mentioned women and whatever so maybe there's a more legitimate connection than I'm trying to force.

I've been having a sort of fuzzy feeling all day, it's not quite déjà vu, but it's a little troubling. Any attempts to describe it will sound ridiculous (my brain tickles!), so I will provide a brief anecdote: I spent all of my geography class wondering why the girl sitting behind me seemed so familiar only to have my friend tell me that it was because we went to high school together. It seemed bizarre, but there are countless mind hacks, literally! Oh, I did it again.

I always feel guilty if I don't show my history when I link to something. In this case, I went through this Wired story to find this amazing piece of research, entitled "Tooth-brushing epilepsy with ictal orgasms". This is my favorite part, from the case report:

...while brushing her teeth, she suddenly felt sexually aroused and experienced orgasm-like euphoria very similar to orgasms during coitus. The erotic feeling was followed by a period of impairment of consciousness lasting for about 2 minutes. There were no jerky movements or convulsions. For the next 5 years, she experienced recurrent episodes of these ‘unknown’ orgasms approximately twice every week and occurring exclusively during tooth brushing. She believed that she was possessed by a demon and felt shame and fear.

Awesome.

Think happy thoughts!

I wasn't going to post anything today because making a snide comment about Zombie Jesus Day seemed beneath me. Oh whoops. There's some great Cyanide and Happiness on the subject if you want to look. Or not. Whichever!

But then I saw this on the bOingbOIng. It's like the complete inversion of Obama Girl or the knockoff, Hot4Hill. So much so that I can't decide if it's satire (or an insidious smear campaign), unlike this which is unfortunately very real. While it reaches the inversion very, very quickly, this does nothing to make it less appalling. Some of the comments on bOingbOing are pretty great in themselves:

Girl on the right in black, I'd knock her up.

Did she really just splash a whole handful of tiny John McCains on her face?

Dr. Jardin, may I have my unicorn chaser now, please?

Of course, someone made the obligatory Chocolate Rain reference, although nothing can be said that the video does not properly express. I especially appreciate the references to 2G1C and Goatse, as if it really is that horrible. I don't think it is, but is a very special sort of auditory assault and I don't want to misstate that. You really just need to witness it for yourself, because when they write about the history of the 2008 election years later and the role of the internet, specifically YouTube, you'll want to be able to say, I watched It's Raining McCain all the way through, children, and I died a little inside. I died a little inside. You'll add lots of emphasis and your kids will think you were really hardcore and whatever unless they get the balls to look it up themselves and witness firsthand as an initiation the exciting world of history. In doing so you'll run a gambit of emotions, from disgust to disinterest to abject horror. After first 20 seconds, I could not look away, transfixed on this portal to the abyss. What will I do now that I've witnessed...fuck, I can't make light of something this dark. Well, I'm gonna go out an get absolutely John McCain.

The video currently has 19 honors. Enjoy!

Cosplay

I'm not going to say anything snarky (aside from the title), but I will post an image of the character he was imitating. I had a roommate that was really, really into the series it's from, and nothing else. Not even girls, as far as I could tell. I wouldn't be so kind if he was trying to save people from drowning because people should know better. I don't want to go into that, but only unless your job title involves the word guard you really have no business trying to save someone from any body of water in any state of matter. Tim Riley may have covered this today. I don't know. I missed the show and don't listen to the podcasts as much as I used to now that they have that wonderful recap.

Everett boy buried in sandbox dies | Top Stories | KING5.com | News for Seattle, Washington

Remember not to violate any comment rules, guys.

I've been playing this game for years

And I never knew it.

Forumwarz RPG: Hilarious Satire Skewers the Web [NSFW] | Compiler from Wired.com

Item Found

I found the image using the search engine Answers.com. I didn't expect it either, so take that! By this point the search itself had become more important than the image. I even looked at gossip sites thinking it might have been posted there if deemed too unsavory for other outlets to publish. They are both attractive women, don't get me wrong, but I still find Jenna Fischer, among others, much more attractive than either of them. I would feel bad if I didn't link to the website where I found them.

The payoff was rather weak compared to the amount of time searching, although I have honed my search-fu in this adventure (level up!). The real loot was found here in the pictures of Finding Nemo on ice. Even with watermarks, I find them amusing.

Wade Wilson is My Hero

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Now playing: Andrew W. K. - Party Hard
via FoxyTunes

Hotel Beds Getting Abused

Here is a blog consisting entirely of pictures jumping on hotel bed rooms. This is my favorite:


BedJump.com - Bed Jump - Hotel Bed Jumping

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Hairless dogs

I just watched a show on PBS, Dogs That Changed the World. It was kind of neat, but one thing really stood out: The Xoloitzcuintli. It's an ancient breed of dog that they Aztecs used in ritual sacrifices and whatnot. It looks... it looks like Satan's pet.

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The Super Monkey

Oh My...

Beppo (comics) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

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Trap Cards

Don't activate them!

400th Post!

We will celebrate this occasion with an image that made me laugh for several minutes.

Elasmotherium chaser

Team Photo

This is an awesome photo.

Happy Snake

I love Happy Snake.


Happy Snake is happy.

Gibbon

I have to say: I love gibbons. With all my body (even my pee pee).Ninjas Gibbons are fast, smooth, cool, strong, powerful, and sweet. Now that the minor REAL Ultimate Power parody is out of the way, I still must confess that gibbons are cool, and by cool I mean totally sweet. Ok, thats the last one. I promise. But lets consider some key facts:
1. Gibbons are mammals.
2. Gibbons fight ALL the time.
3. The purpose of gibbons is to flip out and kill people.
I appologize. I couldn't resist. They have really super cool long arms and pretty much just swing around in the trees all day. Who wouldn't want to do that? And they walk upright on the ground, the only other primate to do it besides humans. And get this, they do it with their super long arms sticking STRAIGHT UP in the air. How cool is that? Very. If you don't think gibbons have real ultimate power you better get a life right...

...sorry. But what I love most about Gibbons is that picture. He's like "oh noes!" Its wonderful. My roommate is addicted to rollercoaster tycoon now. I am an addiction god.